Notes from the field...

I decided to start writing a blog about my daily life raising my son, Nikolas, to be part of the amazing online community of moms who are doing the same. It is far too easy to think of other moms and their lives, and imagine that everything is perfect in their world. They have the perfect house, perfect husband, perfect children, perfect pets....you get the idea. They would certainly never be caught dead in public with hair that hasn't been perfectly styled (or even brushed) or with a telltale sign they were holding baby before stepping out the door: the dreaded puke stain on the shoulder.

It's become apparent that most parents experience alot of the same issues, problems, situations, and it's nice to know that we are not alone in this great adventure.

Becoming a parent for the first time is nothing like the blissful images I had in my head while I was pregnant. I still remember the early days of my pregnancy, where I felt like my life was perfect and my husband and I had everything we wished for. We were going to have a baby, and life was going to be wonderful! Now when I look back, I think to myself: "get your head out of your ass!!!"

Nikolas is 5 weeks old today, and I love him to death. But....this life as a mommy is NOTHING like the sweet images I had in my mind as I lovingly folded his cute litte onsies and sleepers and prepared the nursery for his arrival. Nobody can ever prepare you for what it's really like once you bring that sweet bundle of joy home and you haven't slept at all since giving birth, and he's crying, and you're crying and you wonder how you'll ever survive this new life. Of all the books, articles and websites that I read on a daily basis, I never once came across the fact that babies eat every 2-3 hours!! I don't know why I didn't know this, but it came as a huge shock to me! Of course, Nikolas was (and still is) ready to eat every 2 hours. That means I don't sleep for more than 1.5 hours at a time....ever. I knew there would be a major lack of sleep, but I must admit that during the first couple of weeks, I was feeling very resentful about having to give up my precious time to lounge around, come and go as I please, and sleep for 12 hours if I damn well felt like it!

I think this is one of the drawbacks of waiting until your 30's to start having babies: you get so used to your self-centered life where it's only about you and what you want at any given time, that it becomes a huge shock when your entire world is turned upside down, sideways, and inside out.

I hope that by sharing my experiences someone out there will feel comforted knowing that they are not alone in what they are feeling or experiencing, and I'm hoping that I can reach through my sleep-deprived daze and provide insight, or at least a funny story about the new adventures in my life with my sweet baby boy.