Snot Factory

This morning, I am running on empty. I’ve gone the all-night distance and the fuel gauge is reading well below “E”. But if it means that I am the one that provides my baby comfort in the night while he suffers from a horrible sinus cold, I’d do it again and again.

2 days ago, Nikolas developed a runny nose and one runny eye. I wasn’t sure if it was allergies or a cold coming on, because all fluids were clear, and I’ve heard that indicates allergies. Well, yesterday, it was proven that he has a full-blown cold. And I’m suffering from the worst guilt because while Nikolas needed his mommy and lots of snuggling, I was off caring for someone else’s children.  He did get to spend the day with his grandparents, who have an unlimited supply of hugs and cuddles and are always seeking my permission to hold him when he sleeps.

I picked him up in the afternoon after babysitting all day and brought him home for some extra loving. I must say the selfish part of me likes one aspect of Nikolas being sick: he needs to be snuggled.  It`s hard to get a snuggle with a little boy who is CONSTANTLY on the move. Usually, the only snuggle time we get is when I`m giving him his morning or bed time bottle.

So I was up for the most of the night, bringing Nikolas into bed with me and letting him sleep on my chest. It was the only position he seemed to be able to breathe in and fall into a deep sleep. This was something I was never comfortable doing when he was an infant, as I was so paranoid about him suffocating. But he usually sleeps on his stomach now, and his snoring as well as his  20-something pounds kept me awake for the most part, so I knew he was ok.

I love being that person that he will always have to give him snuggles and comfort, and to make homemade vegetable soup when he is feeling under the weather. It makes up for the lack of sleep.

One Year

Yesterday marked one year since I packed up my desk, said good-bye to my co-workers and left my career in I.T behind to start a new journey in parenthood. I have not had to go to work in an office in one year!

Being on maternity leave sure is not “time off”. I’ve worked longer, harder and with more dedication in the past year than I have in all my years in the job force put together. And the reward? While there is no financial gain in being on maternity leave – the Canadian government actually forces women on mat leave below the poverty line – the other rewards have been so amazing. We have the most beautiful, healthy, happy and most easy-going little boy on the planet. And he is happy. That boy is always smiling. If I leave the house, even just to take the garbage outside, when I return, my boy is so happy to see me, and it just melts my heart to see such a huge smile on his face.

Now, this week, I’m going to be leaving Nikolas at his day home for the first time. I don’t start work for a few weeks. Hell, it’s not even 100% confirmed that I have a job, but we’ve had to reserve a spot in a day home for Nikolas months in advance. And even though I’m not planning starting work until the end of September, we still have to pay for the whole month. So I figured, since we’re paying for the spot, we may as well start using it. Nikolas will get used to the idea of going to a different house 3 days a week, and the great thing is that there are 3 other boys similar in age that will be there on the same days.

I have such mixed feelings about this upcoming week. First of all, I can’t believe my year is over. It feels like just a few weeks ago, we were hanging out by the pool in Cuba, enjoying the hot sun, and thinking of going back to work wasn’t even on my radar. And now here we are.

Now I’m thinking of how life is just going to be so much busier with the hustle and bustle of coordinating 3 people’s schedules. I am only going back 3 days a week for now. It saddens me so much that on the days that I work, I will only get to see Nikolas for 2 hours in the evening before he goes to bed. I couldn’t imagine having to do that with a full time job!

On the other hand, I am looking forward to going back to work for a couple reasons. One of them being that I get to mix up my daily routine a bit, and I may even start to have some concept of time. Like what day of the week it is. The other one? The job I’m likely going to be doing is likely to be mundane. I’m okay with that. Because changing diapers all day is also mundane. I just need a different kind of mundane. Also, it’s going to make me appreciate the time I get to spend with Nikolas even more.

The Perfect Day

Yesterday was such an awesome day. It was one of those days that I’d foolishly fantasize about when I was pregnant and lovingly folding baby clothes and getting the nursery ready for the baby to arrive. It really was that good – relatively speaking. I mean, babies still cry sometimes and the dog still pisses me off on a daily basis. But it was as good as it could be, given the circumstances.

We had our normal daily routine, which I love. I LOVE LOVE LOVE our mornings. It could be because Nikolas normally naps around 2 hours, and it’s when I get my “me time” to laze about and chill-ax, or if I’m feeling especially ambitious, I enjoy a long hot shower and maybe, just maybe, shave my legs. Top AND bottom. We have lazy mornings around here. Nikolas gets up anywhere between 8:00 – 8:30, then we have one of very few snuggle times of the day on the couch wrapped up in a big fuzzy blanket while he has a bottle. Then it’s play time for him, coffee time for me, and within 1.5 hours, breakfast time. After which he promptly goes down for a nap.

We had no plans for the afternoon, so I thought it’d be nice to pack up the dog and head to the city to one of the off leash parks. I had a specific park in mind, but when we drove there, there were Road Closed signs leading up to it! I’m hoping they are just fixing the road, and that the whole park isn’t shut down! So, we turned around and went a little bit further to the Buena Vista off leash park, which is nestled in the river valley. And it’s the most amazing dog park – for a few reasons.

1. It’s stroller friendly

2. It’s freakin huge! There are tons of trails and trees. The dogs get to gallivant in the water. Keko had SUCH a great time.

3. It is my happy place. I love being in the river valley, hitting the trails and enjoying some fresh air. It used to be “my thing”. It’s what I did for fun on almost a daily basis when we lived in the city and had no animals or children that had to be brought along.

Needless to say, I’m going to try my hardest to get back there as much as possible before the season ends.

After enjoying the park for a good hour, I packed up the dog and the baby, and we made our way home. Nikolas quickly fell asleep – I only had to sing “You are my Sunshine” twice. I successfully got him into the house and into his crib where he continued to sleep for another hour while I relaxed on the front porch soaking up the sunshine.

We had more fun as we headed out after supper to pick up a few things at the grocery store where Nikolas did NOT pull any produce off the shelves, specifically blueberries. I learned my lesson last week not to leave the shopping cart within arms’ reach of anything.

Matt came home just in time to put Nikolas to bed while I poured myself a vodka and cranberry pop and put my feet up for the rest of the evening.

This may not sound so perfect or exciting to my friends who have no kids. But trust me, it was a perfect day.